(Make sure you read all the way through for the special bonus at the end of the post!

Last night went by in a blur as I was preparing for the opening of AverageGoddess.com.  I’m setting up interviews, planning tele-classes, loading articles, filming videos… you name it!

Earlier this week, I interviewed Holly Rigsby, America’s #1 Fitness Expert for Busy Moms, and also the author of FitYummyMummy.  Holly is awesome.  She’s the real deal.  She has a real story of how she came to be where she is, she practices what she preaches, and she and her clients have the bodies to show that it works!  Holly works out every day.  WAIT!!!  Before you go screaming away from this page, guess how LONG she works out for?  Seriously, guess.

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15 minutes.  I kid you not.  I’ll be honest, I was a little incredulous when I read that myself (especially since many of you know my history, and that there was a time in my life when I was working out 90 minutes – 2 hours a DAY), but it’s the truth. 

If you’ve read my book or my ezine (both free – get them here), you know that I ask everyone to tell me about their fitness program, how (or IF) they work it into their lifestyle, and what their challenges are.  Almost without fail, the number one answer I get is “I can’t find time to exercise consistently.”  Well my lovelies, I believe Holly has just solved that problem for you!  And did I mention that she’s FUN? 

I was originally planning to make this interview available only to members of AverageGoddess.com, but after speaking with her for well over an hour, I knew this was information that had to be shared.  This is NOT only for moms!!  Yes, Holly addresses the challenges that are unique to moms, but so many of us lead CRAZY-BUSY LIVES, this is the answer to a prayer!  Mom or not, you need to hear what Holly has to say, so I’m giving you the opportunity to download this entire interview.  Free.  Now.  Go get it here –> http://www.averagegoddess.com/hollyrigsby.html

Ok, so I did the interview, and I loved what Holly had to say, but that’s not actually what I wanted to talk about.  Back to last night.  (Sorry, I digress.)

So I’m eyeball deep in working on AverageGoddess.com and networking with amazing people from all over the globe.  Suddenly it’s 8:00, my husband will be home in half an hour, I’m getting hungry, and I haven’t exercised! D’oh!  Just for fun, I wanted to try one of Holly’s workouts, so I hopped over to youtube and picked her “Fat Blasting Holiday Workout.”  (I picked it because the video was just over 2 minutes long – lol!)

Oh my gosh, it was fabulous – and challenging!  I did three of each of the supersets, and by the time I was done, my muscles were fatigued, my heart rate was way up, and I felt great!  (FYI, I’m no fitness slouch, so I know a good workout when I’m getting one!)  The actual workout took me about 12 minutes, plus stretching before and after, I think I was done in under 20 minutes total.  You have GOT to give this a try.

This video gets two thumbs up from me, and while I may be a KittyMummy, I am just as appreciative of a fast effective workout as a BabyMummy!  Enjoy!

P.S.  Holly is providing a special bonus for the members of AverageGoddess.com.  Click here to get your copy of the interview so that you’ll be notified as the site nears completion.  It’s gonna be fantastic!

 We all have people with whom we interact that we find to be, well, difficult.  Their sky is always falling, they incite gossip wars, tattle on others, are intolerant of everyone’s weaknesses but their own, and are just plain whiny.  You started your day pumped up and in a great mood, but within five minutes (or less) they’ve sucked your energy drier than Death Valley.  You look at your watch.  Is the day over yet?  Nope… 7 hours and 55 minutes to go.  Ouch.  This is especially difficult if you work in an intimate environment where you must interact daily and can’t possibly avoid them.  Worse, it may be someone you really like on a personal level.  So what do you DO?

1.       Before you can change how you interact, you must change how you react.  Take a good look at yourself in these situations.  How are you contributing to the problem?  Does this person see you a willing outlet for their woe?  Do you smile, nod, or even verbally indicate agreement?  Stop doing that!  You are actively inviting their negativity into your space!  Don’t encourage them.  Respond to their negativity with as much positivity as you can muster.  This will generally either show them that you are not playing for Team Whiny, or frustrate them into keeping it to themselves.  Interestingly, many negative people don’t even realize what they are doing.  They just see commiserating as a form of bonding.  By responding positively, you may just show them that there is another option.

2.       Seek the source of the negativity.  What is causing their pain?  What are they looking for?  Is there some positive way you can help?  Negative people are frequently attention starved on some level, so they attempt to draw it through sympathy.  Try giving them attention in a different way.  If the individual is a friend, greet them with a big hug, and ask them to share something about themselves that is non-negative – ask about the book they’re reading, or what their kids are doing in school.  If it’s a coworker or more formal relationship, try giving sincere compliments to demonstrate their value – it could be on their clothing, their smile, or their accomplishments.  They will likely blow this off, but repetition breed familiarity and comfort, so keep at it – it’s a worthwhile endeavor.

3.       If you feel confronting them is appropriate, adhere to the following guidelines:

a.       Address the behavior, NOT the person:  “Your negativity about this project is really pulling me down,” as opposed to “You’re so negative and you pull me down!”
b.       Cite specific examples.  “I don’t like your negativity,” will certainly not be effective, especially since they probably don’t even think of themselves as negative.  “It really bothers me when you complain    about Mary like that,” shows them exactly what the issue is.
c.       Don’t expect them to be a mind reader – be prepared to spell out what you’d like to see change.  “I would prefer you not talk to me about others behind their backs.”
d.       Request immediate feedback.  You’ve had your chance, now let them respond, and DON’T interrupt.  Their feelings are every bit as valid as your own.

4.       If you must listen to them, for whatever reason, take internal action to combat the effects of their negativity.

a.       Recognize that there is no such thing as “out there,” so this individual’s negativity is in some way a manifestation of your own feelings. 
b.       Open yourself up.  What do you have to learn from this?
c.       As they are talking, create a filter in your mind.  Ho’oponopono is an excellent technique for this (I love you, I’m sorry, Please forgive me, Thank you.), or keep repeating silently “I love you, and I am OK.”
d.       Try Stacy’s recommendation below for letting love work its magic.  There is no stronger force!

•  @stacyreck says:  Imagine a “Pink Box of Love.” Visually put the negative person in the box & allow the forces-that-be to send them love.
• @leifhansen says: 1. Listen deep to whats behind the negativity (needs/pain). 2. Share vulnerably how it effects you. 3. Talk to supervisor.   

http://www.thegoddesswithinmovie.com 

Follow me on Twitter at http://twitter.com.averagegoddess 

Wishing you a passionate, prosperous, and powerful day! 

Kristy Nichols 

a.k.a. The Average Goddess

Ok, EVERYTHING might be a bit of an exaggeration… pepperjack on cereal might be kind of gross… I guess.  You know, I had been buying it regularly for my black bean quesadillas (see last week’s ezine http://averagegoddess-freebook.com/newsletter11.htm), but somehow this week it wound up being the only cheese in the house (besides my sense of humor).  I mixed it in with salsa… BAM!  I topped my pita pizza… ZING!  I shredded it into soup… WOW!  I put it on a leftover turkey sandwich with nothing else besides mayo… ZIP!  I sprinkled it on my Sweet and Spicy Spinach Salad… YOWEE! 

Suddenly my brain is on fire with possibilities (must be all the jalapeno).  I could put it in my stuffed portabellos instead of mozzerella, add it to my holiday ham roll ups (get this week’s issue of the ezine http://averagegoddess-freebook.com/newslettersignup.htm), top my meatloaf, make a kickin’ garlic bread… SOMEBODY STOP ME!! 

In everyone’s stocking this year:  blocks of pepperjack.

http://www.thegoddesswithinmovie.com
Follow me on Twitter at http://twitter.com/averagegoddess

Wishing you a passionate, prosperous, and powerful day!
Kristy Nichols
a.k.a. The Average Goddess

I came across this great recipe in the May ‘06 issue of Women’s Health and Fitness the other day, and it’s delicious!  If you can’t get by without your Mocha Frappaccino fix, but the cost and calories make you cringe, try this on for size!

2 Tbsp water
1/2 Tbsp instant coffee
1 tsp sugar
about 20 icecubes
1/2 c fat free half-and-half
2 Tbsp chocolate syrup
1/2 c refrigerated fat free whipped topping

Microwave the water and coffee one minute, or until water is hot enough to dissolve coffee.  Add sugar and stir until coffee and sugar are dissolved.  Transfer to a mixing bowl and add six ice cubes.  Stir to accelerate milting, and when ice is almost melted, add the half and half and chocolate syrup.  Pour into blender and add just enough ice for liquid to reach the 16oz mark.  Blend on high 30-60 sec or until slushy.  Pour into a 16 oz tumbler, top with whipped topping and serve!

Makes the equivalent of a “grande” size frappucino, shaves almost 200 calories (and about $4!) off the real thing!

Planning your meals in advance is a priceless tactic for making a quantum leap forward in saving time, money, and energy, all while improving your health!  In the grocery store, you’ll save time by not wandering aimlessly through the aisles, trying to figure out what will “hold” your family for the week, and you’ll save a ton of money by not impulsively tossing items that “sound good” into your cart.  You know exactly what you need to feed your tribe, and if it’s not on the list, it’s not in the cart.  Morning and evening meal preparation are hugely simplified, since you won’t be staring blankly into the cabinets trying to figure out what to make.  Your diet will benefit tremendously as you are planning calmly and with intent, instead of haphazardly on the go.  You can choose smart meals to suit your family’s dietary needs, you won’t end up mindlessly munching or resorting to fast food in desperation, and it gives you the opportunity to plan more variety into your diet, providing a wider assortment of vitamins and nutrients, keeping you healthy and satisfied!

To begin the process, start collecting recipes and keep them in a binder or a database on the computer.  “Recipes,” in this context, does not have to mean something that requires cooking.  It can also mean ready-made store items, like frozen stir-fry meals, lasagnas, etc.  Keep a journal of what you’ve tried and liked.  You can make notes on any changes you’d make the next time you prepare that meal, what you paired it with, how long it took to prepare, the cost of the meal, the nutritional content… whatever information makes sense for your needs.  A three subject notebook can be a great organizer:  Try meals, sides/snacks/appetizers, and desserts/beverages; or just breakfasts, lunches, and dinners.  The only thing that really matters is that all your information is in a single location, not on scraps floating around loose.

 When preparing your grocery list for the week: 

• Take a quick look at the family’s schedule to see on which days it is realistic to plan to cook a meal, how much food will need to be packed in lunches, and when members are likely to be grabbing on the go.
• Make a list of meals that suit your available time.
• Try to incorporate at least one new meal or recipe.
• Look for recipes that provide leftovers or are easily prepared in double batches, and try to include one or two spaced through the week.  This will make lunch preparation super easy.
• Add ingredients for all meals to your grocery list, then go back and cross off items you already have on hand.  This eliminates the unpleasant surprise of discovering something lacking when you’re already cooking.

Keep in mind that putting your system together can (and should) be an organic process.  You do not need to sit down and catalog everything your family has ever eaten all at once.  Just begin keeping track as you move forward week by week, and figure out what level of detail is comfortable for you – maybe you want to jot down notes each evening while it’s fresh in your head, maybe you want to price out meals each week when you return from shopping, or maybe you want to devote an hour a week to cataloguing the previous week’s meals.  Start today and you’ll build your resources in no time!  The benefits of planning your meals will be immediately apparent in your reduced grocery (and restaurant) bills, and reduced stress levels when preparing meals throughout the week.

Other goddess recommendations:

Goddess Brandy, also known as Paintandsoul, puts together a list of lunch, dinner, and snack options for the week, then buys ingredients for them.  When she’s ready to eat, she looks at her list to decide what to make.  (Check out Brandy at www.visionaryrealm.com, www.deviantart.com/paintandsoul, and follow her on Twitter at http://twitter.com/paintandsoul) 

Goddess Sara looks to see what’s in her cabinets first, then matches that with recipes from recipezaar.com.  This is a great tip if you have cabinets full of stuff that’s not getting eaten!  She also makes 3-4 casserole or crockpot meals through the week in order to have “planned-overs.”  (Follow her on Twitter at http://twitter.com/sarafigueroa)

Get your free copy of the book How To Be An Average Goddess at http://www.averagegoddess-freebook.com, and receive a complimentary subscription to the Secrets of the Sisterhood ezine as my gift to you!

Follow Kristy on Twitter at http://twitter.com/averagegoddess

While I was working out this evening, and visualizing myself at my target weight by Thanksgiving (what more effective time to visualize than when actively on the road to one’s goal?), I got to thinking about what I could do differently this winter to prepare me for the onslaught of “hibernation mode.”

I think variety will still be my best defense… I need to make sure that I not only have different styles of workout, but different levels.  Going into winter as the new, much saner me, I can see that the answer is not to drive myself to spring like the last five miles of a marathon, but accomodate myself as necessary.  If there are days that all I want to do is stay curled up warm in bed (and here in Chi-Town, that is a straight-up inevitability), but I know that I can do a workout that will ease my frigid muscles while perking me up for the day ahead, I believe THAT is a lot more likely to get me down the basement stairs than a grueling torture session!

That said, I took my after-workout stretching time (usually 10-15 minutes) to brainstorm on what kind of things I’d like to try.  Friends of mine have highly recommended Jari Love, Ripped to the Core;  Jillian Michaels’ 30-Day Shred; and Qui-Gong, so I think I will start with those.  I will also pick up an aerobic step – preferably one that comes with a video.  I’m still hoping I can talk husby into gettin me a treadmill for xmas to keep last year’s elliptical company downstairs, but he’s balking because my fitness equipment is eating up his basement.  (A word from the voice of wisdom ladies:  NEVER promise your husband the basement can be his… you might want it some day!   None-the-less, I’m trying to win him over with the argument that it’s his job to maintain his trophy wife.  Right?  Can I get some back up on this?

The other prong of my attack will be to continue getting massages at least monthly, but preferably bi-weekly.  It’s amazing to me how it rejuvenates not just the body, but the mind and spirit maybe even more so.

So that’s where I’m at for the moment.  If any of you goddesses have any other suggestions, please do share!

Today was an amazing October day: 72 degrees, with gorgeous golden sunshine.  About 11:30ish, I was headed to the town north of us to make over my mom’s condo while she was at work (today’s her birthday), and then to get the groceries.  I was in the zone this morning, writing articles and taking care of business, so it was a little difficult to wrench myself away.  I found myself in that same frame of mind as I set out on the half hour drive.  I was laser focused on the drab ribbon of road in front of me, and far more annoyed than necessary at the under-the-speed-limit drivers surrounding me.  As we pulled up to the eight millionth red light in five minutes, I told myself to take a deep breath.  I physically pried my hands off the top of the steering wheel where they had lodged Mad Max style, and reminded myself that I had all day to get these things done.  I was on my way to give a gift, not run a life-or-death marathon.  I took another breath and looked up.  This time though, I looked beyond the bumper of the car in front of me.  I saw the most stunning clear blue sky, and the trees draped in all their autumn finery.  They only began changing about two or three days ago, but over night there had been a color explosion.  I was humbled, not for the first time, at how paltry are my decorating skills when compared to those of Mother Nature.  What a master!  It was like a weight lifted off my shoulders, and what’s this?  I’m smiling?!?  Lucky me! 

The metaphor, being in this case as literal as it can get, was certainly not lost on me.   Don’t be so focused on the road directly ahead that you miss the incredible opportunities indubitably hovering in your peripheral vision!  When is the last time you looked up?

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How To Be An Average Goddess

100+ Secrets of Smart, Savvy, Sexy Women
Blazing a Path Through Life!

What do you do after falling off the exercise wagon? 

First things first – stop berating yourself.  Yes, you are.  Somewhere in your mind you are feeling badly about not exercising, or you wouldn’t be worried about getting back in control.  So let it go.  That’s the past, and this is NOW, the only time you have.

To get started, it’s important to figure out what happened.  Look back and try to remember how you were feeling when the wagon left you under the wheels.  Were you stressed, bored, frustrated, worried?  See if you can get to the heart of why you were feeling that way – what was the cause of the emotion?  Once you have that pinned down (and there may be several reasons), the next step is to ask yourself a hard question:  What can YOU do differently?  No one can change your circumstances except you, so that’s where the answer has to lay.  If you feel you are pressed for time and it’s stressing you out, stop trying to fit in five hour-long sessions in a week.  Maybe there are three days you can fit in a full hour, but the other days you have to spread it out in 15 minutes here and 15 there… it all adds up the same.  If you’re bored (and falling into a rut is extremely common), what can you do to shake up your routine?  Get off the treadmill and try the elliptical.  Bike outdoors.  Walk with a friend.  Take a dance class.  You get the idea. 

The next step is to look at your schedule and do a detailed time map, allow for a variable schedule, but be brutally honest – it’s pointless to look at your planner, throw your hands in the air, and declare the situation hopeless.  There IS time if you are willing to MAKE time.  That said, you must be realistic.  One of the main reasons people fall off of the exercise wagon to begin with is unrealistic expectations.  If there is a day in which you have precisely 15 minutes you can claim in the name of fitness, it would be absurd to plan to go to spin class.  For example, I have an early morning meeting on Wednesday and Saturday.  On those days, I do 15 minutes of strength training before work.  When I get home, if I feel like it I might do cardio, but honestly, I usually don’t.  I have learned to be ok with that.  If I had to come home after a long day and force myself back into my workout clothes, I would come to resent that commitment in short order.  That’s no way to build a lasting routine.

Ultimately, it boils down to goals and commitment.  What was your initial goal?  WHY was that goal important, and is it still?  Does it need to be reevaluated?  Refocus on your reasons for working out in the first place.  If you are trying to lose weight, what will losing weight do for you?  How will you feel when you’ve lost the weight?  It’s the same process whether you are trying to improve your fitness, train for an event, or work on a health issue.  Remember why that’s important.  Write it down!  Writing has a way of bringing thoughts into tangible reality, and its power should not be underestimated.  One last question:  What are you afraid will happen if you achieve this goal?  At first, that may sound stupid.  What could be bad about losing weight or getting in shape?  The truth is, many of us have underlying fears or limiting beliefs about our own abilities and how others perceive us.  We may be afraid that someone will judge us, or that we’ll no longer be able to use our weight as an excuse for not living life, or that our husband will feel somehow less “manly” because his wife is so strong.  Let those things go.  Talk about them if you need to.  Write them down, and then burn the piece of paper.  Do whatever you need to do to break that self-defeating cycle, or this won’t be the last time you’ll find yourself in this position. 

Now, to get back ON the wagon, the first step is to just get started.  There are many people who would disagree with this, but I suggest giving yourself one more day, just to prove to that snotty little voice in your head that YOU are the one in control, and YOU are the one who decides what is best for you.  Build your routine back up slowly, and be kind to yourself.  Commit to doing ten minutes.  That’s it.  When those ten minutes are over, give yourself permission to stop.  99 times out of 100, you are going to continue longer than that, but if you don’t, let that be ok!  After a week, make it 15 minutes, or whatever makes sense to you, according to what you discovered when you laid out your schedule.  There may be days when no “dedicated” exercise time is possible.  That’s ok too!  (But don’t let it become a habit, or you’ll be reading this article again.)  On those days, just focus on staying active for a while – walk or bike to run your errands if possible, take the stairs instead of the elevator, park farther away, see how fast you can get in and out of the store, jog back to your car, and bring the grocery bags in the house one at a time!

When you have completed your workout, no matter how long it was or what it consisted of, take a moment to pat yourself on the back.  Congratulate yourself on a job well done, thank your mind for providing the motivation, and thank your body for the wonderful work it’s just done.  As your relationship with yourself improves, you’ll come to see your fitness as a reward, instead of a chore – pulling the wagon instead of riding in it!

Get your free ebook HERE

How To Be An Average Goddess

100+ Secrets of Smart, Savvy, Sexy Women
Blazing a Path Through Life!

Get your FREE copy of the little ebook
that’s already changing lives!

How To Be An Average Goddess

100+ Secrets of Smart, Savvy, Sexy Women,
Blazing a Path Through Life!

www.averagegoddess-freebook.com

I have been using EFT for nearly a year now.  In that time, it has essentially rid me of migraines, healed the shoulder I injured working out, brought my excruciating menstrual cramps to nothing more than a dull throb, calmed and focused me before big presentations, cleared many of the blocks between me and my success, and perfomed many other seeming miracles that I just can’t remember as I sit here writing this.  When I was first learning EFT, holy cow did I feel ridiculous.  I used to close myself in the bathroom, or only do it when my husband was at work.  But then I discovered that it worked… immediatley and effectively.  In fact, the effects were much intensified if I started using EFT in the moment when I was having the discomfort, whether it was mental or physical, as opposed to doing it later when I would have to call up those feelings.  Screw what everybody else thinks – this is awesome!

What might EFT do for you?  Do you have physical or emotional pain that traditional medicines or therapy have been unable to remedy?  Do you “practice” the Law of Attraction, but are having difficulty manifesting your intentions? 

Enter EFT, which is short for Emotional Freedom Technique.  Having been seen to cure ailments including (but not limited to) eating disorders, allergies, asthma, high blood pressure, diabetes, headaches, vision problems, panic / anxiety, PTSD, addiction, carpal tunnel, muscular dystrophy, the common cold, and cancer, and to clear up limiting beliefs regarding success, weight loss, financial abundance, and relationships, you can see why it’s often associated with the motto: “Try it on everything!”  Why not?  It’s free, painless, can be done anywhere, requires no tools, and takes very little time.

EFT is essentially a needle-free form of acupuncture that uses a simple method of tapping with your fingertips to adjust the energy flow through your body’s meridians.  The following is a quote from the website www.emofree.com, which I recommend as your starting point for learning about EFT:

EFT is a powerful new discovery that combines two well established sciences so you can benefit from both at the same time:

1. Mind Body Medicine
2. Acupuncture (this new version does not require needles–anyone can do it).

There is voluminous scientific evidence that each of these methods, applied by itself, can provide impressive relief.  But when you combine them both with EFT, a profound synergistic effect is possible.  I have observed this repeatedly since 1997 and have seen many stunning results. I believe it is this synergism that allows EFT to sometimes work where nothing else will

You will need evidence of this for yourself and so I offer the following for your perusal:

• Try it yourself by downloading the EFT Manual for free.  It gives you all the basics and allows you to test drive EFT on your own issues (although at a beginner’s level).  If you wish to save time and dive right in you can buy our easy to use training Libraries.  They will take you all the way to mastery.  Interestingly, this process is so easy to use that no previous training required.  Caveat: For people who are emotionally or physically frail, qualified health professionals should be consulted before using ANY health procedure.
   
• Peruse the many studies and experiments on our EFT Research and Science section. 
   
• Read the exhaustive list of actual cases on this website.  These are written by clients, therapists and physicians and allow you to see EFT’s possibilities through the eyes of those that have already been there.  Note the wide variety of successes.  This is why one of our sayings is, “Try it on everything.”  It is as close to a Universal Healing Aid as anything I’ve seen.  

Endorsed by Deepak Chopra, Bob Doyle, Norm Shealy M.D., and so many others, EFT was founded by Gary Craig, who built it on the foundation of the discoveries of Dr. Roger Callahan.  It doesn’t require any medical training, special eduation, or even for you to believe that it will work!  In fact, it has nothing to do with beliefs, religion, or spirituality of any sort.  EFT is not an instant fix or magic cure-all, but it is highly effective in most cases.  Like any therapy, it may require multiple and continuing sessions depending on the severity of the issue, but some pain alleviation or emotional relief is better than none!

You can download the basic instruction manual for free here.

For uses of EFT that are more related to the Law of Attraction, I highly recommend Carol Look and Brad Yates.

All my love,
Kristy

P.S.  This technique is NOT meant to be a substitute for medical attention!

 Click the link below to get your FREE copy of

How To Be An Average Goddess

100+ Secrets of Smart, Savvy, Sexy Women,

Blazing a Path Through Life! 

www.averagegoddess-freebook.com